Bending the knee until it cracks

You’ve just started a project with a new client, and there’s excitement in the air. It’s a big client, and expectations are high. Naturally, you want to present yourself and your team in the best possible light. There are small disruptions in the workflow now and then, but you choose to ignore them.

You want to give things time, allowing both you and the client to find your rhythm. Early on, both sides are likely testing each other, trying to figure out the best way to collaborate. You’re focused on showcasing your expertise and solidifying the team, so you don’t dwell too much on minor issues.

However, a few months in, they’re still slow in preparing the sprints, leaving too many things undefined, yet expecting you and your team to deliver everything on time. Your team starts voicing concerns, but you wait for the right moment to bring it up. When you finally do, it becomes clear they’re not really listening — or worse, they just don’t care. Their excuses feel hollow: “The situation is complex, but it is what it is.” They ask for patience and promise to fix things.

Deep down, you doubt anything will change. But you pacify your team and your conscience for a while, reasoning that they’re paying well, so firing them isn’t an option. “No client is perfect,” you tell yourself.

A few sprints later, those small issues have grown. One thing has changed, though: you’ve gotten better at compensating for their mistakes. They’ve noticed your sacrifice, so they pile even more responsibility onto your shoulders. You’re bending as much as possible. But for how long?

I’m sure that more than a few companies out there recognize themselves in this scenario. Some might recall their early days, while others may still be struggling with these challenges.

In my experience, these situations usually end in one of two ways:

• The big client eventually quits, but not before leaving a mess behind. While you were busy cleaning up their endless issues, you neglected other clients and missed new opportunities. You felt stressed and exhausted, and some of your most talented people burned out and left. Overall, your team’s morale took a hit.
• You draw a line. You stand up for your team and protect your company’s long-term interests, no matter the consequences. By doing so, you make room for better clients and save your team, showing them that you truly care.

Empathetic as a brick wall

I may not know how God, karma or the universe works, but I do know this:

The amount of empathy you show for others, how genuinely you want them to succeed, and the effort you put into helping them achieve their goals will eventually come back to you.

The more selfish you are, the more you should invest in others — it’s not the other way around. If you’re working for clients solely for money, personal success, or external rewards, you’ll eventually miss out on things.

And no, this doesn’t mean working beyond what’s budgeted. But if you don’t believe you can deliver something meaningful, either improve your offer or walk away from the work.

Be kind to your client, even when they’re not in the room. And never sell them something you wouldn’t buy for yourself.